It purely happend. I had no time to riposte. And now when I close my eyes I see him. I like it...but I don't because I know it's a lost cause, I just know it. When I had a litte door open I just ignored it. I was a fool, but now I can't change anything and if I could, it will be in vain...but aaaaahhhh... I hope, I don't know why, because I know it never will be like i want but, I hope. I'm a freak :(